My Rainbow is Black and Gray

My rainbow colors are filled with different shades of black and gray

Like them old time movies before colored television was a thing

The ones where every day is cloudy and it always seem to rain

And that one character that can never catch a break

I’m that character

My life is a never-ending cycle of sadness

And every ounce and glimmer of hope is quickly diminished

And the only sparkles in my surroundings is shards of glass under my feet

And the only shimmer I see is when I’m looking in a broken mirror while the tears run down my face

A never-ending movie of grief

My lines never change

And the people in my life are just characters playing their part …. “acting” as if they care

While my cry out for help is taken as me wanting attention and me breaking my role

I can’t get out of character

I use to love the colors of the rainbow

But now that I can no longer see color, what is there left to love?

Why should I have to put effort into how other people feel or think

It’s all an act

This world is the backdrop

And the more I’m here the more I realize I do not belong

Published by Heather Dodson-Frazier

Hello Readers, My name is Heather. My birthday is in November making me a Scorpio. I am currently serving active duty in the army. I love animals, I love cooking, and I love to write. I fall in love easily, and even if it doesn’t work out I always leave an impact on the person I fell in love for. I see the good in everyone which can be a good and bad thing. I have decided to create this blog to share my thoughts with the world. This blog is named ChaoticMinds because that describes me perfectly. My mind is always all over the place. I am a very emotional being and I express the way I feel through writing. This blog is going to be very personal. I am forcing myself out of my comfort zone, and sharing my ChaoticMind with you guys so that anyone who can relate can see that they are not alone. I would like to mention, that although this blog is going to be personal, please realize that it is writing. Some things will not be real. When I say personal, I love to mix my reality with my mind. The blogs that you will read will have my reality mixed with thoughts that I feel sound good in writing. My thoughts are always all over the place, my sentence structure will not be correct, my grammar will be all wrong, I may use too many commas or have run on sentences. The way my mind works is the way I write. (Although, I do a lot better when I have professional writing that needs to be done.) Most of the blogs that I will post will be relateable. My goal is to allow others that have experienced similar situations in life to realize that there is someone out in this world that understands them. If you plan on allowing children on my blog, please monitor what they read. A lot of things will be sexual and dark. Being that I am a Scorpio, those are two of my main qualities. Feel free to contact me with topics that you would love for me to discuss. I will love for this blog to be interactive. You can ask me any questions that you like, and I promise in return to be as honest as possible. I have recently added a new page about my natural hair and have plans on adding my weight loss journey. This is going to wrapped around a lot of things. Please enjoy and SHARE SHARE SHARE! -Heather

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